that word .

My first blog :) I'm just gonna go right into it .
If you follow me on twitter, or if you're a friend of mine on facebook, you may realize that i always rant about relationships and that "L" word. I've been through just about everything when it comes to relationships. I truly feel as if I'm destined to be alone/single although I want to have that "fairy tale love" sooo bad. I wanna have those arguments and make back up. I want to fall asleep talking to that special person, or wake up with a smile because of that sweet text message he sent. I want to feel special to someone. I want that long-term relationship..But at the moment, I feel that those wants are impossible.. I have that " all guys are the same" mentality and it's because they have proven to be. I know people say you can't generalize guys and you have to give em a try, but why keep trying if I only get hurt?? Why keep putting my heart on the line just so it can get crushed? Why open up to someone when it's just going to result in pain? It makes NO sense to me to keep allowing myself to get hurt. My longest relationship was for two years with a guy I was so in love with and would do anything for..but THAT ended because he cheated. With the ex of my recent ex-relationship (i guess) knowing I was cheated on and how hurt I was, he ended up cheating on me as well :/ which opened the scars from the past, cut em deeper, and left me even more heartbroken. I used to question and evaluate myself as if I was the reason that they cheated..but I can honestly say I'm a cool person, goofy, good-looking, all that...I like spoiling my guy..doing romantic things for him, leaving sweet messages, doing WHATEVER he wants to do..so what more could they ask for?? I can honestly say I'm not like most females. I mean I have my flaws, but that's human. All I REALLY ask for in a guy is someone who is honest and understand, respectful, someone who can make me laugh(which isn't hard), someone educated and going somewhere with their life ,Money is no object, I don't care what you have, or about what others think about you... and I just want someone I can just enjoy being around. is that too much to ask for? seriously..is it?? *shrugs and sighs* ... i GUESS it is :/ or maybe it is my fault for letting certain people go right before my eyes..I should have done some things differently, but you learn from your mistakes...I'm just SO ready for something REAL with no bullshit..I swear I am..